Wednesday, October 21, 2009

The return

In all of my wildest dreams about my last day of maternity leave, I would never have imagined sitting downstairs with a baby who won't go back to sleep at 5:30 a.m. with spit up down the front of me. DH took the day off to spend with us. I thought we'd all nap together, go take a walk (it's supposed to be beautiful today), and just spend time with our baby before we abandon her (my feeling) with a stranger (again, the way I feel about it).

Every time I begin to think about returning to work, I break down sobbing. I am dreading it more than I've ever dreaded anything before in my life. I don't want to leave her. Of course, there's lots of things that no one wants to do as adults, but we have to suck it up and do it. So I'll be sucking it up, but I won't like it.

4 comments:

Liz said...

((hugs)) It's not easy, but you'll get through it! Just think how excited you'll be to see her at night. And how much she'll be excited to see her momma!

Sarah Dee said...

Andrew & I have been thinking of you both. {{{hugs}}}

Colleen said...

HUGS HUGS and more HUGS!

Mandy said...

Sending big hugs to you!