18 Weeks

How am I feeling?  Generally, just fine.  I probably would have said on Saturday that the cold was gone...and then I started coughing more on Sunday.  Of course.  So who knows where that's going.  But pregnancy-related, I'm doing pretty good.  My hair is STILL falling out as much as pre-pregnancy and I'm still exhausted.  I'm experiencing a lot of acid reflux, but no heartburn for now, thank goodness.

Emotionally, I'm still looking at my belly and seeing fat.  I'm showing more than most because of my upper belly, which is still bigger than my lower belly.  You'd think just the lower belly would grow with baby, but it's not true at all and that's making me anxious.  Also on the emotional side, I've totally come to terms with the thought of having a boy, so I think I'll be able to be happy no matter what we find out on Friday in that regard.

Weight thoughts: Haven't weighed myself recently, but I have a feeling it isn't going to be good when I do.  I just haven't been watching what I eat much and have been eating out far too much.  I'm hoping that that will decrease for the next few weeks until we get into Christmas, but I'm not confident.  I'm just too tired to cook most of the time and The Hubby isn't ever going to say no to ordering out, even though we both know it's the responsible thing to do.

Doctor appointments?  Just the one this coming Friday for our anatomy scan.  Praying that baby is healthy and willing to show us the goods :) 

Maternity clothes?  I'm pretty much always wearing them at this point.  I can still wear a number of my non-maternity pants because they were always big in the waist and come up over both of my bellies.  I had forgotten about my sister-in-law's maternity shirts that were in a box in the garage that I pulled out before we left for the long weekend.  A lot of them fit really well, so I'm excited about that.  I'm actually wearing one of them right now :)  Maternity shirts just help me feel better about being pregnant and not just fat.


Movement? Maybe?  It's still SO faint.  I'll feel little bumps that I figure are the baby, but it could just as easily be gas.  I'm crossing my fingers that it picks up soon, but am not confident that it will, sadly.

Baby preparation?  We're heading down to IKEA on Thursday to hopefully get some things to finish up Baby Girl's room.  Like last time, I'm anticipating a bit more preparation once we know the gender.

Shutterfly Giveaway Winners

It's your lucky day!  Because there were only 7 entries to my giveaway AND I discovered that I actually had THREE codes to give out, almost half of you were able to win! I used the random number generator on Random.org and these are what it gave me:

#3 corresponds with Samantha, who also asked how I got involved in this.  I found a link on another blog site to apply to get free cards for other occasions and then they contacted me for this holiday season.  Very exciting for me!

#1 of the remaining 6 corresponds with Cassie

#3 of the remaining 5 corresponds with Sarah

I've contacted all of the winners and will be getting the codes out ASAP so you can get your holiday cards created, mailed to yourself, and then sent.  Congratulations to all the winners!  

To those of you who didn't win, I hope you'll still stick around and keep reading.  You never know when I'll say something interesting or have another giveaway!

Collecting Stars

It seems like every day Baby Girl is making up some new pretend thing to play.  Her favorite thing recently has been to collect the stars in the car.  She'll reach up into the air and gather as many stars as she can.  And then she'll share with The Hubby and me.  We have to protect our stars and not let them fly away.  But sometimes if they do fly away, she'll catch them for us and give them back.  And then sometimes she wants to collect ALL of the stars and then will let them free (only to be snagged again).

I feel like there's some sort of metaphor there.  I'm just not sure what it is.  But it's a beautiful thing.  I love her imagination.

If I could collect all the stars and give them to her, I would.  And if she let them go, I'd gather them again.

17 Weeks

How am I feeling?  I'm doing fairly well.  I am still having very slight bouts of nausea, but they're manageable.  I've been feeling stiff and really need to start doing some yoga or at least some regular stretching.  The Cold is still lingering a bit in the form of some snot and coughing in the mornings and evenings.  I'm still exhausted--I fell asleep at 7:30 on Friday night, woke up long enough to move upstairs, and slept until Baby Girl woke at 6:30.  And I was still tired.

Weight thoughts: I weighed myself the other morning and found I'd gained about 4 pounds in 2 weeks--up a total of 12 pounds.  I'm not happy, but it's not a huge deal and not hugely unsurprised.  Most healthy foods give me insane gas (which leads to major gas pains when you can't regularly release the gas....), so I've been avoiding them generally.  That leave me a lot of junk and junk doesn't tend to keep a person full for long, so I eat even more.

Doctor appointments?  Anxiously anticipating our big ultrasound in less than 2 weeks on Friday, December 2nd!

Maternity clothes?  Oh hell yes.  I have been wearing maternity pants full time for the last few days.  I just love the comfort of them and am happy to discover that my pants from last time still fit fairly well.  I still don't *need* them, but I'm wearing them.  Now I just need to get some more long-sleeved shirts.


Movement?  I think so.  It's really faint, but I think I'm feeling some bumps and bubbles in there.  It's comforting, but I don't feel it consistently enough to freak when I don't feel it.  Hoping to feel more soon, of course, but not holding my breath because of the anterior placenta.

Baby preparation?  Nothing major recently.  We got the bedding and a couple of accessories for Baby Girl's big girl room this weekend.  We'll kick into high gear once we know this baby's gender, I think.

Meal Plan 11/20-11/26

It's a light week for cooking.  I was up early enough this morning, though, that I had time to gather coupons for the grocery, so it might not be as cheap of a grocery trip as I'd like to think.

Sunday: Going to my parents' house, so my mom will likely cook chicken and noodles
Monday: Bow Ties with Spicy Sausage in Tomato Cream Sauce
Tuesday: Chicken Pot Pie (will cook chicken while making Monday's meal)
Wednesday: Easy Skillet Pork Chops
Thurday-Saturday: Letting other people cook for us :)

Conversations my husband and I have when the kid isn't around

Once you've been together for ten years and have a kid, when you aren't around the kid, you sort of run out of meaningful things to talk about.  Sure, we talk about our day, but when that topic is exhausted, what do you talk about?

Apparently, we talk about underwear.  Not just any underwear, but underwear that have some sort of a scent to them so that when you fart, you release a pleasant smell.  I had a few arguments about this: 1) at some point, even the pleasant scent will become related to the not-so-pleasant scent it's attempting to cover and 2) the underwear would need to be chemically designed to work WITH the foul odor to interact and create a new, pleasant scent.  And because everyone's...errrr...scent...is different, you would have to have personalized undies.

And then we discussed what pleasant scents we would like to create.  My choices revolved around light, airy scents--baby powder, roses, and the like.  The Hubby, however, decided that he wanted his to smell like a turkey.  Or a pumpkin pie.  And then he decided that we'd have to design different undies for different holidays, both in patterns and for scents.  You could have one that smells like pine trees!  Or chocolate!

And that, my friends, is what happens when my husband and I are in the car together after a long day of work, without a toddler asking us questions like "what's that?" and "why?" and "what's that do?".

Shutterfly Holiday Cards...and a Giveaway!!!

It's time to start thinking about holiday cards.  Ever since Baby Girl was born, we started sending out photo cards (and giving photo books as gifts as well) because I know people love to see her beautiful face.  Many times it's the only contact we make with people throughout the entire year, so they can see how quickly she's growing, too.

I think I've posted before about how much I love Shutterfly, but I wanted to make sure you really know it this year :)  I've tried other websites, but love the quality of Shutterfly.  I typically order holiday cards (and sometimes other cards throughout the rest of the year) through Shutterfly and I wanted to show you some of my favorite designs this year.  I won't tell you which ones I'll use, just in case you're on my Christmas card list!

I actually received a couple like this last year and I love it!  I love that you can include multiple photos as well as the classy, classic design

Of course, this year we just have one kid, so we'll likely just include one picture.  I like this and obviously am leaning toward the monogram designs!

This one is a little different and I love the way it looks with a black and white photo.  

I haven't taken our Christmas card photo yet, but I'm sure it will include a lot of joy.  I can't get Baby Girl to stop smiling most of the time.  This one is really fitting for our family--we laugh all the time together!

Don't you love these designs?  Go check out all of Shutterfly's awesome Christmas card designs!

And here are the details for the giveaway:

I have three codes for 25 free cards for my readers that Shutterfly provided me!  That means THREE of my readers can win codes for 25 free cards (codes expire 12/31/11).  Wow!

I'm going to make entering easy--just go to Shutterfly and come back and tell me which design is your favorite.  You can tell me why, too, but it's not required :)  Make sure I have a way to get into contact with you in case you win.

The giveaway entries will be cut off at 11:59 p.m. Tuesday, November 22nd.  On Wednesday, November 23rd, I will announce the three winners both by emailing them individually and on the blog.

Baby's Gender

I was just coming to post that I have this gut feeling that this baby is a boy and the fact that the heartbeat (this past visit the h/b was in the 140s or 150s--I forget) and cravings (savory instead of sweet, even though I remember craving savory with Baby Girl sometimes, too) all suggest it just make me even more sure.

And then I was going back through old blog posts and found this.  Same doctor appointment around 16 weeks, same lower heartbeat, just like last time.  I suppose it is possible this could be a girl.  Only time will tell--just over 2 weeks until we find out (hopefully)!

I think I mentioned before that I wasn't enjoying the thought of having a boy.  Heck, saying I wasn't enjoying the thought is a gross understatement--I was scared and pissed and anxious about the idea of having a boy.  But I've actually started calling this baby a "he" and it really is growing on me.  Will I be sad not to use Baby Girl's clothes again?  Of course.  But whatever God's plan is for this child, it will join our family and it will be what is meant to be and I will embrace it.  I think I've convinced myself enough that it's a boy that I won't even cry if the doctor tells us it's a boy.  I even have moments where I *want* it to be a boy so The Hubby and his family will be extra happy.

But now it's just a waiting game.  We shall see!

Sickness, and the meltdown it caused

On Sunday, October 30th, I got a really sore throat on the right side, like I had some major drainage coming from my ears and down my throat.  Ouch.  When I got up the next morning, it had migrated to the left side of my throat.  Throughout the remainder of the week, I felt worse and worse.  The worst of it (for both Baby Girl and me) was Saturday and Sunday, November 5th and 6th.  I had a really runny nose, a cough, and was just plain exhausted.

I felt quite a bit better by Monday and went to work.  I felt like I was generally getting better throughout the week.  I was coughing less, my nose was drying up, and I'd assumed, while I'd been feeling rough for awhile, that I'd at least feel normal by this past weekend, two weeks after it all started.

That doesn't seem to be the case.  I don't know if I actually feel worse, but I sure don't feel better.  I think my nose is running more.  Both Baby Girl and I are still coughing, especially in the morning.  I would probably be worried about her or myself if we weren't both feeling the same way.

To make matters worse, on Saturday afternoon, I started feeling nauseous.  I couldn't decide if I should eat or not and am glad now that I ate dinner because it at least made me feel better at the time.  I was afflicted with the nausea all day on Sunday as well and only felt better when I was actually eating.  I've tried all my normal fixes--drinking more water, eating smaller meals with more protein--nothing is working.  Ugh.  I don't know if it's pregnancy nausea or related to being sick.  I even fell asleep very early in the recliner and took a nap on Sunday.  All I know is that I'm tired of being sick.  I'm tired not feeling good.  I'm tired of being tired. 

It all came to a head yesterday.  I walked up the stairs to my bedroom, laid down on my bed, and just cried.  I didn't want Baby Girl to see me so upset.  I sobbed.  At some point, Baby Girl and The Hubby came upstairs and we all hung out in our bed for about 45 minutes, playing in the "tunnel" (under the sheets).  It was fun.  Soon they left, though, and I fell asleep.  I hadn't intended to, but when I woke up, I was in a bit better spirits. 

I wish I could say I feel better today, but I just don't.  My nose feels stuffy, my head is cloudy, I can't regulate my temperature (a typical pregnancy symptom for me), I'm still coughing some, and I'm exhausted.  I just want to feel more normal, even if it's a pregnant normal.

/whine

Meal Plan 11/13-11/19

We've failed miserably at cooking as much as planned each week, so this week we're only planning for 5 meals and one of those is using leftovers from another meal.  I've also had a resurgence of nausea and exhaustion, as well as STILL fighting the same cold that I've had for two solid weeks now, so I'm anticipating a lack of energy to cook, too.  Look for a blog post entirely devoted to whining about this very soon.

Sunday: Mexican Chicken and Rice--I think I found this on Pinterest and it was great.  It was a lot like a family favorite, Salsafied Chicken and Rice, but with a bit more veggies.  Baby Girl ate her entire plateful, eagerly, and The Hubby and I agreed that we need to have it on a regular basis. 

Monday: Swiss Casserole Chicken--If you look back at my last few weeks of meal plans, this has been on it.  For some reason, we really fail at crockpot meals some weeks.  I'm going to try really hard to get this made this week, especially since the cheese is already sliced (I was getting ready to make it one morning when I discovered my chicken had gone bad, even though it was the day of the Sell By date).

Tuesday: Sweet Pork Tacos with Cilantro Ranch Dressing--As soon as this came up on my Google Reader on Cassie's blog, I knew I had to make it.  I'm hoping it'll turn out okay with Caffeine Free Diet Coke.  I could go buy a 2L of Caffeine Free regular Coke...hmmm...  Either way, I'm really excited to try this.  I also hope that we can ration the meat--the pork loin we had in the freezer was a little smaller than the recipe calls for and I'm hoping to use it for quesadillas later in the week.

Wednesday: Chicken nuggets and tater tots.  I saw this (sort of) on Cassie's blog when I read her meal plan for this week.  I bought some pretzels and might try crusting the chicken in it.  We'll see :)

Thursday: Quesadillas with the leftover pork

Friday: No plans, but we'll likely eat out at least once during the week, so we can cook a leftover meal this night.

Saturday: We have a tradition of having Chipotle on Football Saturdays.  I'd thought it wouldn't happen every week again this year, but since I got pregnant at the beginning of football season, I figured, why not?  Maybe this kid will come out loving Mexican (authentic, Americanized--we don't discriminate) as much as its big sister does!

14 and 15....and might as well do 16 weeks

In all the excitement of making our official announcement, I stopped writing updated blog posts about my pregnancy, so I've missed the last few weeks.  I think it's okay, though, as nothing particularly exciting has happened.


How am I feeling?  Just fine, except for this cold.  I started getting a sore throat (not just scratchy) October 30th and am still blowing my nose and coughing some.  Baby Girl has it, too, and is still doing the same.  I think we both generally feel okay and are sleeping fine, but the cough is hanging on for a long time.  But as far as pregnancy goes, I'm doing good.  No more nausea!  I'm still exhausted every day, but I don't really remember that letting up much last time, either.  I have crazy dreams at least every other night when I typically dream only once or twice a month.  I'm also still having shortness of breath unrelated to the sickness.  All typical pregnancy stuff that doesn't bother me too much.  I still don't have to pee any more than I did pre-pregnancy.  I hope I'm blessed to escape that symptom again this pregnancy.

Weight thoughts: Up about 8 pounds.  Not horrible, but not great.  I know it will only go up from here, but I'm hoping to curb it a bit.  Some veggies, especially peas, don't sound great to me, so I've been eating less veggies than I normally do with dinner.  But I have found that I love a raw bell pepper and/or a salad, so I've been trying to have those on a regular basis.

Doctor appointments?  Just had one on Monday, November 7th.  We were scheduled to see a different doctor since my regular OB was on GYN rotation in the hospital, but were pleasantly surprised when my regular OB popped in and did my appointment!  The nurse had had me disrobe from the waist down and that confused and concerned the OB.  She immediately asked, "Are you doing okay?  Any bleeding?"  I told her I was fine...just following orders.  She laughed.  :)

She found baby's heartbeat--147 bpm.  I'm leaning toward boy, but of course we'll see.  She asked if we'll want to find out the sex of the baby and we told her yes.  She said, "Let's see if we can find out today..." and started moving around the ultrasound wand.  She said everything was a little small so she couldn't tell anything, but she did print out a picture of our little one for us to take home.  Love her.  She sent us down for the bloodwork for our quad screen and told us she'd see us on December 2nd--for our anatomy scan and (hopefully) gender determination!

Maternity clothes?  I've worn maternity pants twice in the last couple of weeks, but mostly because I didn't feel like wearing regular pants or didn't have anything clean.  I'm still wearing all of my normal clothes if I want.


Movement?  I've wondered if I've been feeling movement some in the last few days, but have told myself that I'm probably not since my doctor told me I have an anterior placenta.  From my understanding, that's the only problem with the anterior placenta--muffled or no feeling of movement.  Plus whenever I'm pregnant, I have an awful amount of gas, so I'm sure that's what I'm feeling.  I'm still holding out hope that I'll feel my baby move soon, though!

Baby preparation?  The Hubby continues to clear out Baby Girl's room and she continues to anticipate her big move there.  I'm anxiously awaiting the gender determination so I can start planning the nursery and determine if we'll need new clothes and other items.  I've also been loosely shopping for a double stroller and trying to decide what kind to get, especially since Baby Girl is older and more independent, but much better behaved when she's strapped into a stroller.

Meltdown

Written 10/27/2011

I just walked to a different floor in my office, sat down on the toilet in the last stall, and cried like a little baby.

I am so exhausted.

I went out last night.  No, not to a club or a bar--to book club.  There were four of us there and I really enjoyed myself and the company.  I got home, however, around 11:30 and was asleep around midnight.

Then, this morning, Baby Girl decided to wake up early.  She started moaning (her normal "I'm awake" noises) around 5:30, which is over an hour prior to the time The Hubby typically has to wake her up.  I went in and got her around 6:10, which was twenty precious minutes prior to the time The Hubby typically wakes me up.

Add on top of that the fact that I'm 13 1/2 weeks pregnant, stressed about work stuff and my inability to concentrate, stressed about the state of my house, stressed about getting Baby Girl's Halloween costume made, and trying my damnedest not to get a cold....and I'm just done.  I've felt like I could fall asleep at any moment for weeks now.

Today I just realized how incredibly worn out I am and just broke down and cried.  I don't have any idea how I'm going to find the energy to cook dinner, to deal with Baby Girl (toddlers are SO EXHAUSTING), to clean my house, to do laundry, to make Baby Girl's costume...to do anything but sleep.  And that's why I cried.  I cried from stress and from exhaustion.

13 Weeks

Written 10/23/2011 @ 13w1d

How am I feeling?  If you would have asked me at 12w6d, I would have told you that the nausea had returned and I felt pretty awful.  But today I'm doing pretty well.  I even overate last night without too many negative consequences.  The predominant symptoms that I experienced very early (morning diarrhea and headaches) have returned, but I'm hoping they don't stick around for long.  I'm also experiencing quite a bit of pregnancy-related congestion that I keep thinking will turn into a cold.  Imagine feeling like you're going to get a cold for over a week.  That's where I am right now.  Just relieved to be officially in the 2nd trimester and hoping the energy and feelings of normalcy return soon.

Weight thoughts: As of Saturday morning, I'm up 1.8 lbs from the day we found out we were pregnant, which I think is pretty darn good since I'm not watching what I'm eating nearly as closely as before.  I'm sure the aforementioned symptom doesn't hurt, of course. Of course, I participated in a clinical study today (Monday) and it made it look like I'd gained even more.  Crazy doctor office scales.

Doctor appointments?  Not until November 7th.  I'll be seeing one of my doctor's colleagues, which I'm actually looking forward to.  If this baby cooperates, I'd like to deliver vaginally, which means I'd be more likely to have one of the other doctors in the practice deliver the baby.  With a scheduled C-section, I wasn't terribly concerned about that.

Maternity clothes? Not yet.  I want to, but don't really have a need to.  The only type of clothes that aren't fitting well are my jeans and they work okay with a hair band on the button.  My maternity jeans were never that comfortable, so I'm not in a hurry to wear those.  I did try on a new-to-me pair of maternity khakis, though, and am really tempted to wear those.  I definitely didn't look pregnant whatsoever in those, though.

Baby preparation?  For me, it's mostly been mental.  I'm still getting used to this.  Every single day I think about how things will be different once we have another human to be in charge of.  We did tell our good friends last Sunday, which was really fun.  They were genuinely excited for us, which was a great feeling.  We also told The Hubby's parents on Saturday (10/22) and they were really, really excited.  I asked Baby Girl, "Isn't there something you wanted to talk to Grandma and Pops about?"  She said, "Baby Boomer".  The Hubby asked her where "Baby Boomer" is and she said, "In Mommy's tummy".  It didn't take long for them to figure it out from there.

The Hubby has started working on cleaning out the room that will be Baby Girl's, much to my dismay.  I'm not really that excited about moving her to a new room with a big girl bed.  She, however, is incredibly excited about it.  She asked me tonight about her bed and told me that she wants Boomer to sleep in her bed after I told her that her crib is her bed for awhile longer.  She also decided she wants to paint her new room purple, so we'll be working on that soon.

12 Weeks

Written 10/17/2011

This weekend we hit 12 weeks, which, even though 13 weeks is technically the beginning of the 2nd trimester, felt like a big milestone.  We got to hear baby's heartbeat again on Wednesday and feel a lot more comfortable with being happy now.

I'm feeling pretty good.  I was prepared on Saturday to write that the nausea was gone, but then got hit with another bout on Sunday.  I think I just get off on my eating schedule during the weekends and that's what causes me to get nauseous.  I was fearful that dinner would make me feel worse (last time I was feeling nauseous before having Chipotle, I felt worse afterward), but I ate my full bowl and felt great afterwards.

We got to share the good news with one of our closest couple friends yesterday and it felt great.  We were a little nervous about telling them because they've had a rough year of their own, but they really seemed genuinely happy for us, which was a relief.  We're hoping to tell The Hubby's parents this weekend (if they aren't available for us to visit, we might have to Skype with them--keeping this secret is killing me!) and then we'll be able to tell the world.

I'm still not really showing, but notice the swelling myself.  I could probably keep wearing my normal clothes for the next couple of months, but am not sure I want to do that.  Once we tell people, I like looking more pregnant than fat!  So I'll probably switch to maternity clothes in the next month.

As I was writing this post, I realized I hadn't scheduled our 16 week appointment (the computer system was down when we were there before), so I called.  Our next appointment will be November 7th (we'll be 15w2d) with one of my doctor's associates since my doctor will be on hospital duty that week (she warned us at our last appointment).  Since I was on the phone, I asked to schedule our subsequent appointment, hoping to get a better time slot than late afternoon.  The scheduler said we could come on Friday, December 2nd at 8:30 a.m.  MUCH better time slot AND we'll only be 18w6d.  That will be our anatomy scan (the scheduler says they do them between 18 weeks and 22 weeks--so glad to be on the early end of that this time!  Last time we were over 21 weeks!).  I can't wait to find out what we're having.

Doctor Appointment

Written 10/13/2011

Yesterday we went back to the doctor for our 12-ish week appointment (will be 12 weeks on Saturday 10/15).  

I should start the story a little earlier, though, where I'm at work.  The appointment was at 2:45 and at 2:06 I realized I HAD to pee and I wasn't going to make it to pee in a cup.  So I went to the bathroom and proceeded to chug 16 ounces of water so I could pee again at 2:45.  We get to the appointment and I am successful at peeing in the cup (so much so that I could have overflowed it).  Woo!

We waited for a LONG time in the exam room.  There were a few signs asking patients to be patient, which made us laugh because we'd never had to wait for too long.  Until that day.  We didn't get to see the doctor until about 3:30.  Wow.

From there, the appointment was pretty standard.  I unbuttoned my pants and she stuck a paper towel around the edge of my pants and panties so she didn't get any goop on them.  She pulled out the ultrasound and we waited.  And waited.  I began to panic (I found out later from The Hubby that I clenched my fists).  She must have realized how scared I was because she said, "I can *see* it, but we just can't hear it".  Thank goodness. Then she tells me that my bladder was extremely full.  Seriously?  I didn't even feel like I needed to pee.  In fact, I didn't end up peeing until about 6:00 that evening!

Anyway, she moved the wand around my bladder enough that we were finally able to hear that beautiful whoosh whoosh whoosh.  The doctor said it was in the 160s (was 168 at the first appointment).

And that was it.  It was a really short appointment once we saw the doctor.  We declined the ultra screen, but indicated that we'll do the quad screen when the time comes (at the next appointment, I think).  And then she was gone!

One thing to note.  At home, my scale is telling me that I've gained two pounds since finding out we were pregnant almost two months ago.  That's great compared to gaining 10 pounds prior to my first appointment at 9 weeks with Baby Girl ;)  But the office scale is saying I gained 2.5 pounds since our last appointment four weeks ago.  I know it's not a big deal, but I'm hoping not to gain as much with Baby #2 than I did with Baby Girl.  I'm not stressing about it, but I just want the record to note that my home scale says I haven't gained that much!  :)

11 Weeks

Written 10/11/2011

Eleven weeks.  I'm actually amazed that we're here.  I don't really know what I expected to happen, but it's astonishing to me that we're less than two weeks from the 2nd trimester.  I go back to the doctor tomorrow afternoon where we're hoping to hear that beautiful heartbeat again.  Once we do, I'll breathe a big sigh of relief.

I'm actually feeling a lot less anxiety right now about the pregnancy.  I FEEL pregnant.  I feel off and on nausea (still related to when and what I eat).  My stomach is definitely protruding, especially by the end of the day.  I'm getting out of breath when I go up the stairs.  I'm hitting a wall mid-afternoon and then again early evening where I just want to sleep.  I haven't fallen asleep just hanging out at the house like I did when I was pregnant with Baby Girl, though.  The combination of these symptoms have given me a sense of calm.  I hope the calm is warranted.

I think this is the longest I've ever kept a secret, too.  We aren't telling many people for many reasons.  It's gotten complicated keeping the secret, but we'll be sharing soon enough, I think.  My mom asked if she could tell after our appointment tomorrow and looked shocked when I said no.  This is on *our* timeline, not hers.  I think we still want to get even closer to twelve or thirteen weeks before we share with the world.  And there are some very important people we need to tell before we start screaming it from the rooftops.  All in good time.

I need to get some bloodwork done.  I was supposed to do it between my last appointment and this one, I think, but forgot to walk down and do it.  Maybe I'll do it right before (or after, since we'll have some time, and to save some pain in case the bloodwork isn't necessary) the appointment tomorrow.

9 & 10 Weeks

written 10/3/11

I didn't really post much at nine weeks because nothing was really happening.  I was feeling better in general and just coasting along, waiting for our next doctor appointment.

Now we're at 10w2d and things have taken a turn for the worse.  My nausea has ramped back up and I'm feeling worse than I was earlier in the pregnancy.  I don't know whether I can blame my horrible food choices on Saturday (which sat just fine right after eating, but I found myself feeling horrible after eating dinner and couldn't even finish it) or if it's just baby nausea.  I ate better on Sunday and was able to go out for dinner and enjoy my food, thank goodness.  But I'm finding myself feeling pretty awful again today.  Nothing like Sunday morning or Saturday night, but I just don't feel well.  And that sucks.  Hoping that it passes once I get back into a routine of eating normal again.

And now we're counting the days until our next appointment.  9 days, in case you were wondering.

We told my parents on Saturday that we're expecting and they were appropriately surprised and excited for us.  I think they're far more excited for Baby Girl to be a big sister than anything, actually.  I'm convinced she's going to be a great big sister.  She's great with the babies at the sitter and loves babies in general.

Another recent development is that I feel like I've really popped.  It's happened far earlier this time around.  I'm having a hard time hiding my pregnancy (since we still haven't told many people) but, thanks to having clothes that are too big, don't need to move to maternity clothes just yet.  You'd better bet, though, that once we start making the pregnancy public, I'll be wearing maternity clothes just for the comfort factor!

8 Weeks

Written 9/21/11 - 8w4d

How am I feeling?  I actually feel great.  I've had some bouts with exhaustion, but nothing horrible.  Last time I was falling asleep on the couch before dinner, but now I can at least make it until Baby Girl is in bed.

The nausea hasn't been bad at all.  It's definitely tapering off and I only get it when I get really hungry or really full.  For instance, yesterday I had TWO large pitas with tabbouleh, feta, and tzatziki in the middle of the afternoon.  I felt fine for the first hour after eating it, but then by the time we got home, I was feeling pretty rough and just needed to lay on the couch for awhile.

I still get surprised by a shooting pain in my left bo.ob sometimes, but it's nothing severe.  Just surprising.

I feel like the bloat is really on now.  I notice it by the end of the day, but I'm pretty confident that most people just think I'm looking fat.  Still no sign of needing to move to maternity clothes--I'm in the same place I was last time in that I have some clothes that were getting too big on me when I got pregnant, so now I can just wear them for awhile.  Once we've told people about the pregnancy, I'll start wearing some cuter maternity shirts, just because I can.  That, and to make people realize it's baby and not fat.

My weight seems to be holding fairly steady.  In the first couple of weeks I gained about 5 pounds, even though I was actually eating less.  I lost 3 of those and am back to up around 2.  I'm allowing myself to eat junk again, though, so I'm guessing the pounds will creep on sooner than later.

What's new?  We got to see our little gummy bear last Wednesday.  I was having major anxiety about not feeling pregnant, so they set me up with an ultrasound at 7 1/2 weeks instead of having to wait until 9w6d.  Thank goodness!  We also met our new OB and we both love her.  We didn't think there was any way we'd like her as much as our old OB (who is going to be focusing on surgeries instead of delivering babies), but we really, really do.  Baby's heartbeat was 168 bpm and we got to see the spine, umbilical cord, and the rest of the blob of baby that was in there.  How cool.  Our next appointment is at 11 1/2 weeks.  I think after that appointment we'll start telling the world, but will want to tell a few close friends before then...just need to figure out how and when :)

Fun facts?  I love that The Hubby is so into this pregnancy.  Since he has an iPhone he has a pregnancy app that's giving him updates about the baby, so sometimes he'll randomly tell me what size the baby is now.  For instance, last night he told me the baby is the size of an olive.  How exciting and absolutely adorable :)

Let It Begin

Written 9/6/2011

The eating has begun.  The first few weeks I wasn't any hungrier (or maybe even less hungry) than I was pre-positive test.  But today I'm eating like crazy.  I'm eating to stave off nausea and I'm eating to relieve stress.  I'm craving all sort of random things and just want to eat and eat and eat.  Pinterest is not my friend, as I'm pinning all sorts of delicious-looking treats that I don't have the energy to make.  But they sure look good.

7 Weeks

(written September 12th)

How am I feeling? 


Too damned normal.  It's actually scaring the shit out of me.  I don't feel nauseous anymore.  I still haven't hit the exhaustion.  I feel pretty much like myself and I'm scared.  The only lingering symptoms are my inability to breathe well and my inability to regulate my body temperature--I'm always either too hot or too cold and sometimes both, depending on the part of my body.

What's new?


I told our sitter on Friday so she could plan for next year and hopefully not pick up any infants after awhile.  I just told my boss today because we're having a lot of discussions about the future and projects that will be upcoming and I wanted her to be able to plan accordingly.  My boss, ever the realist (after having two miscarriages and a decade-long struggle with infertility and failed adoptions), advised me not to tell anyone until I have my first appointment (still 2 1/2 weeks away), which made me even more nervous about my lack of symptoms.  She acknowledged the very real possibility of me having a miscarriage (her first one was discovered at her 10 week appointment) and now I'm completely anxious.

What's Baby Girl think?


We haven't really told her.  We're not planning on telling her until at least after the first appointment and then we won't really talk about it much until I start to show so she has some tangible evidence that there's a baby in there.  But we've talked with her every few days about what she would think about having a baby in the house.  As of right now, she's said she'd rock "her" to sleep, feed her, change her diapers, share her toys, etc.  I have no doubt she's going to be a great big sister.

6 Weeks

Written 9/5/2011

I'm feeling much the same as last week, with bated breath.  The fact that I don't feel horrible could mean one of three things: 1) this pregnancy is going to fail, 2) this is going to be a great pregnancy or 3) the nasty nausea and exhaustion will hit sooner.  It really depends on the day which I believe to be true, but it's never #2.

I've had some bouts of nausea off and on, but nothing unmanageable.  I've still got off and on tender boobs as well and some small cramping that feels like stretchy.  My digestive system seems to have calmed down and I'm not waking to go to the bathroom much anymore.  I'm not as hungry as I was when I was sticking to counting points, which is sort of weird, but I'm committed to listening to my body.  My body temperature is impossible to maintain--I'm either too hot or too cold, without fail.

Also, my hair is still falling out in clumps.  It started in June or so, which I assume is my normal summer shed plus some since I nursed until late April.  But it's still going and it is GROSS.  Waiting for the hair retention to kick in.

I'm noticing a definite expansion of my waist, but no real bloating yet--which is another reason I'm fearing for this pregnancy, although I have no record of how early the exhaustion, nausea, or bloating hit last time.

I feel like I should just relax and be grateful for feeling so relatively good.  I've had a lot of stuff going on at work and also have been really active recently and if I were feeling worse, I don't know how I could've managed.

Update (just 5 hours later):  I'm an asshole.  The nausea has really kicked in and I can't tell for sure, but think it's taking the form of a meat aversion again.  I got a huge wave while cutting up chicken for dinner tonight and had a hard time composing myself.  Ugh.  I should be happy--nausea is a sign of a healthy pregnancy.  But damn...this is a bad week at work for me to be feeling like shit.  Praying for no actual puking again this time.

Five (and a half) Weeks

Written 8/31

I'm feeling...okay.  I find that if I let my stomach get acid-y, I get nauseous.  I also apparently ate too much yesterday (I had a snack of a small apple and a stick of string cheese at 3:30) and was really nauseous from that.  But otherwise I'm not feeling much nausea.

I'm still having some digestive issues.  I woke up around 2:30 Monday night needing to go to the bathroom.  I can't tell if it's when I sleep on my back or if it's unrelated to sleeping position.  I'm SO not ready for my sleep positioner already, so I'm hoping it's unrelated.

I'm still feeling a little crampy sometimes, but again, nothing too severe.  I'm waiting for it all to hit, though, knowing that the full-blown nausea hit at 6 weeks for me last time.

My waist is already gone.  I might have been delusional thinking I had one again, but it's totally gone already.  I'm not bloating too badly, but can tell a bit of a difference.

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but my starting weight was 208, which was really exciting (I hadn't been below 210 since I was pregnant with Baby Girl).  Even though I'm actually eating less than I was before getting pregnant (I'm committed to listening to my body and my body doesn't seem as hungry now), I've gained 4.5 pounds already, which makes me sad.  My goal is to gain as little as possible (without going overboard, of course).

4 Weeks

Blogger's Note: You're going to be seeing a lot of posts very quickly.  I'm going to try to space them out some.  I continued to blog after finding out we were pregnant, but just didn't publish the posts.  Now that word is out, I'm going ahead with the posts.
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Written 8/21/11

I fear I've already gotten to the point where I cannot go too long without eating.  I fear even more that the nausea has already set in and that scares me.  We went to the park and when we got home I felt horrible.  It could've been the heat, the lack of water, or the lack of food, but I just needed to sit.  The Hubby cooked our dinner for us, thankfully.  But man...I hope this isn't the start of something ugly.

I've got a really short fuse these days with Baby Girl, too.  I can blame the pregnancy, but I think it's just how unreasonable and unpredictable she can be.  She gets mad when I fold over the bread on her sandwich.  She cries when I cut up food.  She sobs for the most ridiculous (in my adult mind) reasons and I just have a hard time handling it.  I understand that she's trying to exert her independence and I think we're really understanding with that.  That's probably why I get so upset--we usually give her a chance to do something on her own or "like a big girl", but then if she can't handle it, we need to step in.  And that's when the waterworks begin.

Anyway, pregnancy news is small.  We haven't told anyone and are waiting for awhile longer.  Our first appointment isn't until September 30th, but I can't imagine waiting that long to tell our families. 

I should mention, though, that I'm being forced to switch OBs.  My OB (who I just saw for my annual fairly recently) won't be delivering babies after October.  I was going to switch to the OB that we had for our gender determination with Baby Girl (my OB didn't do the anatomy scan), but she's really popular and, therefore, harder to get in to see.  I chose another OB in the practice, a woman.  I feel a little embarrassed now, but I did ask if she speaks English well.  I can be irritable when pregnant and really want to be able to communicate with my doctor well.  Anyway, she does.  So we'll be seeing her--I hope that it goes well, we like her, and that she's open to a VBAC if conditions are right for it.

So that's about it.  I'm waiting for the exhaustion to hit, waiting for the nausea, waiting for everything else.  I did test again yesterday morning, just to see.  Still pregnant and the line is even darker than before.

This Morning

Written 8/17/11

This morning after The Hubby's alarm went off I went back to sleep and had a dream.  I dreamed that I was running all over my parents' house (that didn't look like my parents' house), looking for some pregnancy tests that I'd hidden.  I thought I'd hidden them in the sleeve of a coat that was hanging in the coat closet and went to the closet and the coat was gone.  I ran around a bit more, looking for the tests and finally found them on the floor in a pile (I had boxes of 50 or 100!) with other "junk" from the coat closet that my mom had tossed out.  This means mom had seen them.  I grabbed them and started toward the bathroom, but my mom was in front of me.  I see her back start to get wet and then she starts running, something my mom never does.  She ran into my dad's arms, sobbing that she'd peed herself again.  And that's when I woke up.

Yeah, the dream was completely bizarre, but I had it in my mind that I needed to test.  I'd thought about my estimation of when I'd ovulated, if I had when I normally did (approx 8/4) and decided if I wanted to test that I should wait until at least today, which would be approximately 12 dpo.  Last time I didn't test until I was closer to being late--my period isn't due this time until Saturday and honestly, with the amount of stress I've been under, I wouldn't have been surprised if I hadn't ovulated at all or late.

I went downstairs, found a stash of cheap tests a friend had given me after she got pregnant, stowed a few in my underwear, and went back up to our bathroom, which still has a sleeve of plastic cups from when we were TTC Baby Girl.  I was moving pretty quickly--I really had to go!  I peed in the cup, dipped the stick, and sat and read a book for awhile, waiting (The Hubby was still sleeping and I didn't want to disturb him, especially since I was confident it would be negative).  After 3-5 minutes, I glanced at the stick, fully prepared to see one line.

I saw two.

I immediately assumed that either 1) it was a false positive or 2) it was detecting some hormone from ovulation and I'm actually ovulating instead of pregnant.

I dipped again.

Still two lines.

And I was shocked.  Just shocked.

I finished up my pottying, dumped the pee from the cup, and went out to our bed.  The Hubby was awake and looked up at me and said he thought I was in the shower.  I turned on my bedside lamp and showed him the sticks and asked him what he saw.  He squinted.  He said, "what am I supposed to see?"  Duh, dude...  Then he said, "I see two lines."  A pause.  "What's that mean?"

Seriously, dude?  I have to spell it out for you?

"Two lines means I'm pregnant."

"Are you kidding?"

Yeah, I think it's official.  We're both in shock.

Hell, I'm still in shock.  I still don't believe it.  I've been trying to figure out what could've happened to have the test messed up.  This was our first month of "trying without trying" (where I knew we had sex within a few days of my expected ovulation, but didn't go out of our way to time it, temp, do the fertility monitor, etc.).  And it just happened?  No waiting for months?  No negative tests?  No way.

I emailed a picture of the pee sticks to the friend who had given them to me and she was as shocked as I was (she knew I was hesitant to even "try without trying", let alone actually TTC).

Physically, I'm still feeling some boob twinges.  I felt a couple sharp, short cramps a couple of days ago (implantation, I'm guessing).  I'm starting to feel a bit bloated and a bit crampy.  All of these things could technically mean AF is on her way.  Or it could mean I'm pregnant.

For now I'm proceeding as if I'm pregnant--better to behave as if I am than to take meds and drink as if I weren't.

Holy shit.  This is (possibly) happening.

Meal Plan 11/6 - 11/12

This week will be an odd one in our house, as our sitter is closed 11/6 through 11/13.  Baby Girl's care will be provided by a combination of both of her grandmas, a great-grandma, and her parents.  This also means that we need more servings for dinner and for leftovers for lunch than normal.  Also, today we'll be hosting a dinner with The Hubby's mom, grandma, and brother and his family, so we'll have a full house. 


Sunday: Spaghetti, meat sauce, garlic bread, and salad
Monday: Swiss Casserole Chicken, that I've been planning to make for weeks

None of the other meals have a pre-determined night--it all depends on what time we get home from work and how much time we have in the evenings to do prep.

Hot dogs & mac and cheese
Pot Roast, potatoes, carrots, and onions
Pot Roast Enchiladas
Pork Chops Over Rice
Chili