I've been feeling really down recently whenever I look in the mirror. I keep telling myself I should ENJOY being pregnant. But I'm just having a really hard time with what my body is doing. If it were just getting bigger, I could be okay, but it's not a cute little round baby bump that I see on so many others. In some clothes, it can look alright, but I've been avoiding clothes that actually show off the baby bump because they also show off my
other bump. Then I put on the shirt I'm wearing today and immediately realized that I could EASILY pass as not pregnant at all. And that just sucks.
Damnit, I lost 90 pounds before getting pregnant. I really thought I could wear this baby well. And I even was somewhat okay with how I looked for the first 20 weeks, thinking that by 20 weeks my belly would round out and I'd be cute and pregnant. Here I am at 21 weeks and still just looking like I could be just fat.
Okay, enough whining. I'm sorry. I know I say this all the time, but it's really weighing on me and not allowing me to really enjoy this and say "hey look, I'm pregnant" and really makes me resent the
skinny, pregnant bitches people around me who ARE cute and pregnant. It's making for a lot of sadness on my part, which sucks.
3 comments:
1. You are allowed to feel however you feel and you are allowed to vent, complain and whine about it, especially on your blog.
2. You know this already, but I am right there with you. I just feel and look fat, and I am six freaking months pregnant. I never in a million years thought I could still pass as not pregnant by this point.
3. Lots of hugs.
Allison,
I should have said this yesterday, but you really do look great. But I'm sorry you are having self esteem issues. I can certainly understand that.
I'm sure you look great! I had the same problem when I was pregnant. I will give you a little secret for getting your baby bump looking more like baby than fat- wear the maternity pants that have the full panel that extends all the way over your belly up to your boobs. And wear maternity shirts that highlight your belly rather than hide it. (think empire waists)
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