When I was TTC, it felt like I was always waiting. Waiting for my fertile time, in the "two week wait". And it drove me batty.
Yet here I am, again, waiting. I should be enjoying every second of being pregnant. I am, but I have to admit that it still doesn't feel real. So I wait for it to feel real.
I'm waiting to have an actual baby bump and not just feel fat. I'm waiting for that first movement. Then I'm waiting for 21 weeks so we can find out what we're having (we have nursery ideas for both genders...so no painting or buying or registering until then). At some point I'm sure I'll be waiting to be able to feel movement from the outside. And then at some point I'll look back and think that my pregnancy went too quickly.
I know I need to take time to enjoy this. To enjoy the knowledge that there's a little human inside me, growing. So I'll try. I know I won't be able to get this time back and will wish for the days when I could still wear my pre-pregnancy jeans (like I am today) and wish for the days when I don't wake up every night to pee and wish for the days where I can function like a fairly normal human being. So I'll try to take it all in and relish these days, as I'm sure they'll soon be gone.
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I asked a close teacher friend how long it takes for it to feel real. Her answer was sometime around when the baby turns 3. I guess we'll both be waiting for awhile.
You'll be there very soon, I promise!
I don't think you sound like a Debbie Downer at all. It is hard, all the waiting. I know I do just feel fat and exhausted for no reason, and it is frustrating. And my brain can't even fathom baby names or nursery furniture until we know what the baby is. So I think you sound completely normal, and I think if a person tried to get pregnant for a decade, they'd still have these feelings once they were there.
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